One of my daughters is a lead in a school play. In the past, she has been very private about all things involved in acting. She would practice her auditions by herself, learn her lines with no help, and only practice her songs when no one could hear her. I would show up to the performance to be completely surprised since she never practiced anything in front of me. This last year though, she became brave enough to ask me to help her with her audition. She felt self conscious as we practiced the night before, but she wanted to improve more than she didn’t want me to see. We worked together late into the night before her audition. She would do her lines, and then I would tell her what she could do to improve them. She did it over and over and over again. She worked on her body posture, her movements being bigger, her accent, and keeping her face forward so none of her expression was lost to the people watching her. She improved her performance significantly by being willing to have someone watch her and suggest improvement. And it paid off! She got the lead she was most hoping for.
As the play looms near, I’ve had the opportunity to help with various things. Mostly sewing costumes. Lots and lots of costumes. I spent my Saturday sewing at the theater while they had their tech rehearsal. While I was there, I had a chance to see my daughter act in a couple of scenes. I was surprised by what I saw. She had reverted back to having less stage presence. I told her I was surprised and asked her about all the things she had worked on for her audition. She pretty much summed it up by saying that it felt weird to act that full out when no one else was. We talked about how she was able to always be in character the year before when she didn’t have a lead. She said it was easier because she didn’t feel like everyone was looking at her.
I think that is how so many of us live our lives. We feel uncomfortable shining when other people aren’t. We feel self conscious living more fully or vibrantly when everyone around is is trying to blend in and not stand out. I don’t know exactly why that is. Maybe we don’t want to overshadow other people. Or we don’t want everyone thinking we are trying to get attention. Or we are worried what other people will think if they DO notice us. It’s less scary to blend in and stay in the shadows. But it is also less fulfilling.
So be brave. Stand out. Be vibrant and shine. Live your life like no one is watching.
